Love is the answer, now what was the question?!!

On May 31, 2015, I met a man for coffee at Starbucks that I had met on-line.  Yes, on-line dating!  At my age?  What?  Well, why not?!!  I had just re-entered my Utah lifeon May 1st from living in California for a project the past year, commuting back and forth as I have for so many years.

That coffee date lasted for 2 1/2 hours. I listened to him tell me about his life. I had convinced myself to tell him about myself, and my sobriety. I was a little scared at first, and thought it would be a “deal breaker”.  The time flew by, and we were both surprised how long we had been there. We agreed to call and go out again.

Skeptical at first, I went home thinking that may not happen, but there was something about him that was different.  He texted later, called, we made a lunch date two days later, laughed and talked some more.  We continued to have lunch, dinner, take long rides and stop for sushi or BBQ or whatever we wanted to, kissed goodnight and made plans to meet for breakfast.  We held hands, we talked about our lives, we enjoyed the music, and the era we grew up in, our childhoods. We were thoughtful with each other.  We had fun!  We started cooking together, making green smoothies in the morning and swimming before work.  He was pleasantly surprised about my zest for swimming to stay active with my knee recuperation, and didn’t let on that he was a PRO until we were swimming with my grandsons much later on!!

I began to trust him and feel comfortable sharing my life, my heart and my space. He is a committed, selective, thoughtful, compassionate, strong and funny man.  He didn’t want a fly by night relationship.  He is present, has direct eye contact, and believes in connection with one other person.   He has attended many AA meetings with me and has fun with our friends.

On New Year’s Eve he asked me to marry him at the stroke of midnight, and of course I said “yes”, and I’m so excited!  We have met each other’s families and our kids have given their blessing!

I’m so grateful to God and my sobriety to be experiencing this at this time of my life.  I have become softer, and more loving to those around me.  I feel loved and cared for.  It was worth every single minute of whatever it was that brought us here; for our life experiences, for the tears and joy of a lifetime.

—Rebecca R